It is that time of the year when the children and young people of this
land return to school and we are heading into the fall season. Sadly, we have to bid goodbye to the warmth
and green of the summer and say hello to the beauty and crispness of the
fall. For many it is harvest time and
the bounty of the land is being reaped.
In this article we are going to look at the family, its strength and how
we can maintain it in a society where the definition of family has changed so
dramatically.
I had the privilege of raising four children comprised of two boys and
two girls. My children now have families
of their own and they have blessed us with eight grandchildren. Surprisingly, we have four boys and four
girls we call grandchildren. When we
started our family my wife Lois and I made a decision that we were going to
follow the promise of Josh 24:15, which states, “As for me and my house we will
serve the Lord.” I was not raised in a
Christian home but fortunately by the time we had children there were resources
available to help us. Focus on the
family was a resource we tapped into time and time again. We made a lot of mistakes along the way but
amazingly our children turned out to be gifted, creative, stable and consistent
adults who are raising fantastic grandchildren of course I am a little
Bias. I want to share with you some
little tidbits we learned on raising godly, stable, creative resourceful and
faithful children.
It says in Proverb 22:6, “Train a child in the way they should go and
when they are mature they will not depart from it.” Here are some healthy ways to train your
children. First, Show and tell, teach
children right from wrong with calm words and actions. Never discipline when you are angry,
frustrated or out of control. Secondly,
set limits. Children need to know where
the boundaries are. It gives them
stability and consistency. Thirdly, give
them your attention and hear them out.
Children often act out when they believe we are not paying attention to
them. Also catch them when they are
being good this shows that we are interested in them not only when they are
acting out but also when they are being good.
Always be liberal in your praise and keep the lines of communication
open in all stages of their development.
Fourthly, as a parent you need to be prepared for trouble. Don’t look for it but be ready. Children are like a star trek movie they are
running on impulse. Know the difference between
childish irresponsibility and willful defiance.
You need to know when not to respond because believe it or not your
child sometimes are pushing buttons, full of sugar, tired or cranky. Remember a soft answer turns away wrath. Many times you can redirect behavior and get
them distracted. Fifthly, give consequences
and follow through. Nothing makes a
child spoiled, unruly and hard to handle than letting them do what they
want. You are hurting them, yourself and
others. When you say you are going to do
something follow through. This builds
respect, trust, loyalty and consistency.
Children expect a parent to be truthful and honest. Always deal with willful defiance in a loving,
firm manner by either doing a time out or some other form of effective discipline.
Lastly, make God the center of your
home. Have family devotions, be an
example in consistent love and behavior.
You lead them to Christ by your actions more than your words.
In a society of changing values, cultural shifts and redefinition of
traditional concepts, the home is still the strongest institution in
society. Don’t let special interest
groups, activists, social re-constructionists, celebrities, educators, or
politicians form the structure of your home.
This responsibility is yours alone.
You know what is best for your children and family. Don’t abdicate your responsibility because if
you do someone will gladly do it for you and you may like the results.
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