James 3:3-12

1.       James has much to say about the power of the tongue and words in general.  We can stumble in many ways but the man who does not stumble with his tongue or words is a perfect man for he can control his own body.  David said in Psalm 141:3 “Set a watch, O LORD, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips.”  The way to protect yourself from saying the wrong thing, at the wrong time, for the wrong reason is to follow James 1:19, be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger. 

a.         James uses the illustrations of the bit for the horse and the rudder for a ship.  The tongue is a small member yet it makes great boast.  It speaks what is in the heart.  Jesus said. 

b.       James says the tongue has these qualities. In vs 6-10. 

I.                     It is fire.

II.                     A world of unrighteousness. 

III.                  Sets the course of an entire life. 

IV.                  Sets on fire and is led by hell. 

V.                   Beast, bird, reptile, sea creature can be tamed by mankind.  But no human being can tame the tongue.  We need divine help.

VI.                  It is restless.

VII.                Full of deadly poison.

c.         The tongue is a paradox with it we bless the Lord and our father and then we curse people with it who are made in the likeness of God.  Blessing and cursing should not come from the same mouth.  It is unnatural.  A spring cannot give salty or fresh water.  Fruit trees cannot bear strange fruit.  Yet the mouth does. 

2.       “Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity. We can choose to use this force constructively with words of encouragement, or destructively using words of despair. Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate and to humble.”  Rabbi Yehuda Berg stated this.

a.        Considering the ‘powerful effect of the words we utter, we must ask the Lord to help us and discipline ourselves to speak in a way that conveys respect, gentleness and humility. One of the clearest sign of a God working in our moral life is right speech. Perfecting our speech is one of the keystones of mature believers .

b.       Before speaking take a few moments to contemplate what you will say and how you will say it; while considering the impact they will have on the listeners. Be kind to all and speak words that are beacons of inspiration, enthusiasm and encouragement to all. Kind and sweet words are always music to the ears of the listeners.  Right words, always come from right thinking. 

c.        Paul says Philippians 4: Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.  You will speak what you think on.

d.       When we speak we should speak with mindfulness, in a way to solidify peace and compassion in our characters. Not only do our words matter, but also the tone which we use has a huge impact. There are certain rules that should guide all our communications with others.

I.         Always speak the truth,

II.        Avoid exaggerations.

III.      Be consistent in what you are saying,

IV.      Don’t use double standards in addressing people

V.       Don’t use your words to manipulate others. 

VI.      Most importantly do not use words to insult or belittle anyone.

e.       Speaking honestly in any negotiation between individuals or groups is necessary. Speaking the truth in a loving way is also necessary.  Jesus Christ was a master at this.  We must demonstrate loving speech” even when we are communicating about our differences and disagreements. We must be ‘lovingly honest’; we need to ask the Lord for His help and discipline ourselves to speak in a manner that conveys respect, gentleness, and humility’.

3.       When we need to talk candidly about something difficult with another person, we must focus on the conversation with keen attention and purpose.

a.        During the conversation, we must listen patiently, speak tactfully, and tell the truth as we understand it. We must align our words, voice inflection and tone, eye expression, body language, and actions with our inner awareness in an honest exchange.

b.       Remember you words can heal or hurt. The choice is yours.